I just want to make it clear that I do not thing I have arrived or am anywhere near perfect. I have days where I struggle with my will when part of me wants the excitement of the past. I still have some anger issues, well some of these things God has taken away and recently I have begun to let back in.
I am confused still about a lot of things concerning spirituality. Sometimes I feel guilty for things that I think that God is displeased with and really it is just stuff that I was taught was wrong.
All I ever intend to do when I speak of things being different now, is that God in his grace has helped me to overcome those things. But I have a long, long way to go for perfection and you know what? I don’t have to be perfect anyway! (((hugs))). I hope that my readers can understand this and know I give no credit for any change to myself, nor do I think I am a completed vessel.
I can’t believe I actually slept last night. It kinda messed with my routine but I actually I feel halfway normal today, so far.
I have mentioned a few times in other people’s blog and maybe in mine that I wish I was a writer like most of you. If I could write one book, I would write an autobiography. The problems with that would be: my memory is messed up and I wouldn’t be able to keep things straight, my spelling and grammar would suck, and it would be hard to keep it balanced. I have had many phases of my life and it would be hard not to go off on some tangent about one thing. I would have definitely need a “ghost writer” or whatever.
I found an attempt of an autobiography the other day on the internet. I quit writing it for some reason. But what I did write is a disaster lol. I will give you the link in case you like soap operas with a twist. Just a warning, if you read it, the last part is very sexually graffic. then it leaves you hanging. Sorry if it offends anyone. If you want you can look it over up to that part.
Anyway, I don’t know how long ago I wrote this. I know it was in the last several years sometime. I don’t know what state of mind I was in. I know that I have changed a lot since then. But it’s some history. But you will probably tell me to forget the book idea lol.
I read a lot of blogs and I think because of all the “fazes” I have been through in my life, the hurt, hate, mistakes, risks, and the emotions, that I really do put myself in a lot of bloggers shoes and feel them. I started a new page called “Prayers”. When I read blogs and I am moved by their issues or they remind me of issues that move me, I add it to my “prayers”. I really do send prayers for each one. If you pray, feel free to send a prayer too for the things on the list. Also, if you have something that you really need prayers sent for, just write it in a comment and I will add it to the list. I think I will read a few more blogs and take my nap. have a good day guys!